Worry Warts

"You worry about you, don't worry about others."
And that's when my mommy radar went on high alert.
"You take care of yourself, it's not up to you to worry about me."
OK, enough.
Um, what's going on here? and why are we being so self-centered?
Here it comes...
"Well, xxxxx (name withheld to keep eye rolling and tire slashing to a minimum) said that we should only worry about ourselves. It's up to each person to take care of themselves, not each other."
Ugh.
Alright, I understand the context I'm sure the statement was used. Tattling was probably the center of the discussion and yes I'm sure it seemed a vague, open-ended statement about taking care of number one seemed suffice. Unfortunately, many kids, my kids, are literal. Opportunities to worry about others create growth.
We're not supposed to talk about the little girl who takes the bus after school back to the Y.
How much more understanding would the kids have about homelessness if they knew it directly effected one of their friends? We're not supposed to talk about the anger issues of the little boy who got kicked out of class. Shouldn't environmental and psychological problems be out in the open? Life is not puppy dogs and butterflies, sometimes things suck. Sometimes these things are brought on by us and sometimes they are not!!! They need to know that! They need to know that the world doesn't revolve around them. They need to know that even if their friend is in trouble, albeit by their own hand or not, they should be there to help. They need to accept their friends for who they are, not who they think they are. They need to not be ashamed of their circumstances, where they live, who they live with, what medication they take to get through the day.
We need to worry about each other.
We need to help where we can, because we can.
The more we learn about each other the more compassion we have. How many light bulbs have dinged on when I've learned more about a friends past and tied it in with things I had previously deemed irrational in the present. Maybe it's the ol' knowledge is power line and not making assumptions. If I only worry about me then I'm going to be making assumptions about you. Yes, tattling is annoying. But it's talking, it's communication, not good communication per se, but communication none the less. If they are chronic about it then maybe we need to figure out why they are trying to bolster themselves up and tear others down, talk about it. Communicate. Worry on little ones, we'll talk about all the implications whenever you want.