Easter.

The living room was dark as we sat, son and I. Staying up to rest in each others company long after daddy and siblings snuck off to bed.

He asks. “Mom? Does God ever talk to you?” Breathing in I gather my meandering thought processes to focus on correct response. I settle on truth.

“Yes.”

silence. I slyly lure out more.

“Does God talk to you?”

“oh sure, all the time.”

Silence.

“Well, what does He say?”

“Mainly, I just hear Him calling my name. Sometimes I hear Him calling for Elijah, but I don't think he hears.”

To not hear when He's calling...

Ultimately, isn't that what I want? To hear my name, to know my Savior and Lord really does know I’m down here? That He knows my frustrations, my sorrow, my unrelenting questions, to be soothed into calm reassurance that there's a concrete reason for all of this!

John 20: 11-16


11 But Mary stood outside by the tomb weeping, and as she wept she stooped down and looked into the tomb. 12 And she saw two angels in white sitting, one at the head and the other at the feet, where the body of Jesus had lain. 13 Then they said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?”
She said to them, “Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him.”
14 Now when she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that it was Jesus. 15 Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?”
She, supposing Him to be the gardener, said to Him, “Sir, if You have carried Him away, tell me where You have laid Him, and I will take Him away.”
16 Jesus said to her, “Mary!”
She turned and said to Him,[a] “Rabboni!” (which is to say, Teacher).

She heard her name. Preceding the tomb, the cross, the scourging and crown of thorns, lies The Lords Supper; On the night in which He was betrayed our Lord, took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, “This is My body which is given for you; do this in remembrance of Me.”
Stop.
Back Up.
On THAT night, He gave thanks! I’m pretty darn quick to give thanks for the friends that can watch a kid at the last minute or my husband to get 'A' day off but when I’m being betrayed? When things hurt? I managed a whole Summer and Fall without saying thanks for ANYTHING!! But this winter, I tasted joy. Now, as I'm folding one unending load of laundry after another, I’m thanking Jesus for arms and legs that fill them.
And I hear Him whisper my name.

As I’m calming heartbroken tears of injustice, defiant siblings standing stoic with jaws set, I'm thanking God for opportunities to teach my children about forgiveness and grace.
Again, I hear my name.

I wash dish, after dish, scorching water sucking life from my hands and I thank my Lord for the tiny pea shoots I can see from my kitchen window, tendrils reaching forever skyward, Thank You Lord for this.
He speaks my name.

It's Spring. New life cracking frosty earth. I am so blessed. I have Hope because Hope lives in me! Lot's of things bring happiness, my new waffle iron made me happy, but waffle irons eventually break. A great buy on yarn makes me really happy, but I knit it, gift it and then it's gone.

True joy is not fleeting.
True joy is a relationship.
True joy cannot be bought.
True joy lives in you, guides you, nourishes you, soothes you , gives you comfort when you don't have the answers to life's circumstances because True Joy, possess understanding that surpasses all others.

I recently read if God answered all of my prayers just how I wanted, wouldn't that make me God?! Wow.

John 20: 11-16, again.


11 But Mary stood outside by the tomb weeping,(she was a faithful follower but in that moment the only thing she knew was that she didn't know what was going on anymore, she was confused, heartbroken, probably pretty angry too!) and as she wept she stooped down and looked into the tomb. (she acted, she stooped down, she didn't just sit there and cry!) 12 And she saw two angels in white sitting, one at the head and the other at the feet, where the body of Jesus had lain. 13 Then they said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping?”
She said to them, “Because they have taken away my Lord, and I do not know where they have laid Him.”
14 Now when she had said this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, and did not know that it was Jesus. 15 Jesus said to her, “Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?”
She, supposing Him to be the gardener, said to Him, “Sir, if You have carried Him away, tell me where You have laid Him, and I will take Him away.” (she's so upset, so hurt, so confused, she doesn't recognize Jesus, the man that cast out her demons, the man that was her whole world standing right in front of her until...)
16 Jesus said to her, “Mary!”
She turned and said to Him,[a] “Rabboni!” (which is to say, Teacher). (Joy!!!!)

When I actively, constantly, seek Him, through prayer, through giving thanks, through picking up my bible and reading just one passage slowly, soaking in each syllable.  He speaks my name.  He's not in that tomb. He IS ALIVE! He's right by my side and He's right by your side too, whispering your name, simply waiting for you to hear.

~ MOPS Tea and Testimony